In my country, people who abhore racism promote tribalism while those that frown at tribalism encourage various other forms of prejudice.
I know this very sweet girl. By sweet, I mean she is loving and lovely, compassionate, hardworking, godly, and beautiful. She has never given me any reason to doubt how good she is in our over 8 years of friendship. She is from Umuahia in Abia State.
Amaka (pseudonym) has been seeing this guy since early 2018. You would hardly have a conversation with her with hearing stuffs like ‘my boyfriend’ said this, ‘my man’ said that.
At a point I became worried because I felt she was advertising her relationship so much that other guys may begin to lose interest. Afterall she wasn’t married and shouldn’t ordinarily shut every other doors to friendship.
Her boyfriend engaged her on her birthday last April and she was so excited about it. I was happy for her because it worked. The whole flaunting and shutting of the door to every other person payed off. She was going to end up with the one guy she loved deep down. But things are not looking good at the moment.
The family of Amaka’s fiance has an issue with where Amaka comes from. To them, Umuahia ladies are wayward and flirtatious. They claim they want the best for their son and cannot endorse the marriage.
Her boyfriends father is a Professor in a federal university and the mum, a top nurse in a teaching hospital. I’m trying to say they are well educated. Yet!
The Amaka that I know is not anything close to ‘wayward.’ We even encourage her to unwind atimes because she is so focused on building herself and loving her boyfriend.
After gisting me about what’s going on, I conducted a mini-research and came across a paper the would-have-been father-in-law wrote on racism and ethnic bias. He had strongly criticized racism in football. I was shocked. That was the same man opposing a beautiful union just because of the prospective daughter-in-law’s LGA in Abia State.
I wasn’t so shocked because I live in a society where people carefully select the wrong things to do and the bad ones to criticize.
What happened to ‘judging’ people by the content of their character and not by their ethnic, political or religious affiliations?
And yes, the boyfriends parents are yet to meet Amaka in person but yeah, she is such a wayward girl and can’t make a good idea to their wonderful son. O di mma.
It will do you so much good to do away with your preconceived ideas and prejudices about people. Get to know them before you judge if you must.
Amaka may not like the fact that I brought this here but I just don’t want another person suffering the same fate.
I pause. Receive sense.
Ihuoma Chiadikaobi is an editor with Vantage News, a photographer and sports enthusiast